Husbands and Wives from Ephesians 5 - Part 4

Husbands, we are to love our wives as Christ loved the church. That love was and continues to be SACRIFICIAL.

That love is also SANCTIFYING. The Apostle Paul writes, "...Christ...gave himself up for her (the church) that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish" Ephesians 5:25-27.

To SANCTIFY means to SET APART from one thing to another. Christ died that we, the church, would be separated from sin and the world to belong exclusively to HIM. Our love for our wives is to win the hearts of our wives so that they love us EXCLUSIVELY.

Christ sanctifies us to Himself more and more through HIS WORD. As husbands, we are to win the heart of our wives to ourselves through OUR WORDS and HIS WORDS.

Our words have a powerful impact on our marriage relationship. Words of anger and irritation and belittlement have a divisive, separating effect. Our wife will generally feel and act as close to (or as far away from) us as our words allow her to be.

On the other hand, words of encouragement and affirmation and hope and commitment DRAW our wife to us and create oneness and intimacy.

• "I love you...I will always love you."
• "You are becoming more beautiful with each passing day."
• "You are such an excellent manager of our home."
• "I love the way you connect with the children when they are discouraged."

But we are also to love our wives with HIS WORDS. We have responsibility for helping along and nurturing the SPIRITUAL GROWTH of our wife. We are to be before the Lord receiving fresh bread from heaven each morning so that we can pass it on to our wife. Of course, she has her own responsibility for her spiritual relationship with the Lord, but we are to SHEPHERD her towards HIM and HIS truth.

Does she need encouragement? The WORD of God has it.

Does she need correction? The WORD of God has it.

Does she need hope? The WORD of God has it.

Does she need to be taught some area of God's truth? The WORD of God has it.

But we must be in the WORD to fetch it for our wives. WE must be growing and learning from God through His Word first, and then we can be good shepherds of our wives.